Wow. Really enjoyed this post, which of course sounds odd when you're having a tough time of it and discussing hard things. I, too, don't yet know what is going on with my physical health and I appreciated reading what you have to say and your experience of it.
Interestingly Schiedam is in the Netherlands, which at the time was (probably?) joined with at least the Dutch part of Belgium (Flanders) in which Geel sits. So a lot of Dutch / Flemish ties In this piece :)
(Also random fact but Geel means Yellow in Dutch)
Great post! I hope you at least find some answers to your health questions soon 💛
"I can’t remember if I did something yesterday or five minutes ago or in a dream."
I also love this section on Wilgefortis:
"In my research, I discovered the non-binary saint, which I’m extremely late to. (Gender scholars love religious minutia and many have written about this saint already. Those academic nerds know more about God than any church-going good old boy.)
The saint’s name was Wilgefortis. Her father forced her to get engaged to a king when she was a teenager. In response, she prayed to become ugly and God grew her a beard. Her father was furious and crucified her. So all in all, a pretty standard coming out story.
Here’s where it gets fun: Some scholars believe that 'Wilgefortis' is just a wood carving of Jesus Christ that people found too feminine, so they had to scramble to make up a story. 'Oh her? Don’t worry. It’s not Jesus with a BBL. It’s a different ‘bearded woman’ saint. What was her name? Uh. Wilgefortis?' Sounds legit. Completely explains the bearded figure with feminine features up on a cross."
Highly relatable. Got confirmed as Pelagia when I was in high school, and as a GNC adult I now can't help but be amused at the foreshadowing. Sending you lots of good energy as you navigate your health issues as well. That stuff is rough and shitty, and I hope you find clarity and a path to healing soon.
(TW: unsolicited advice; Ignore if unhelpful! Two immediate fam members have MS but I got a "clean" MRI a couple months ago after similar issues. Just know that you are the world's greatest expert on your body and your experience. Document everything, log your symptoms if you can, and trust that you're not making it up. And I hope you crowdfund for an MRI if you're open to it. You'd either have the confirmation you need to start some extremely helpful meds OR you'll have a Big Thing ruled out and can pivot accordingly.)
This was so beautiful and perfect. Thank you for writing this.
Oh thanks for reading! I’m so glad you liked it and also sad if it’s relatable lol
Wow. Really enjoyed this post, which of course sounds odd when you're having a tough time of it and discussing hard things. I, too, don't yet know what is going on with my physical health and I appreciated reading what you have to say and your experience of it.
It doesn’t sound anything. I appreciate your reading! And I’m sorry you relate 💜
Interestingly Schiedam is in the Netherlands, which at the time was (probably?) joined with at least the Dutch part of Belgium (Flanders) in which Geel sits. So a lot of Dutch / Flemish ties In this piece :)
(Also random fact but Geel means Yellow in Dutch)
Great post! I hope you at least find some answers to your health questions soon 💛
Maybe a sign to move to the Netherlands.
Dear Gabe,
This is a really meaningful piece.
I love this line:
"I can’t remember if I did something yesterday or five minutes ago or in a dream."
I also love this section on Wilgefortis:
"In my research, I discovered the non-binary saint, which I’m extremely late to. (Gender scholars love religious minutia and many have written about this saint already. Those academic nerds know more about God than any church-going good old boy.)
The saint’s name was Wilgefortis. Her father forced her to get engaged to a king when she was a teenager. In response, she prayed to become ugly and God grew her a beard. Her father was furious and crucified her. So all in all, a pretty standard coming out story.
Here’s where it gets fun: Some scholars believe that 'Wilgefortis' is just a wood carving of Jesus Christ that people found too feminine, so they had to scramble to make up a story. 'Oh her? Don’t worry. It’s not Jesus with a BBL. It’s a different ‘bearded woman’ saint. What was her name? Uh. Wilgefortis?' Sounds legit. Completely explains the bearded figure with feminine features up on a cross."
And I love YOU.
Thanks for sharing all this!
Sending love to your brain and heart and all,
Myq
Aw Myq thank you. Wilgefortis forever 🤙🏼 you always leave such lovely comments
Thank you friend! Love love!
Highly relatable. Got confirmed as Pelagia when I was in high school, and as a GNC adult I now can't help but be amused at the foreshadowing. Sending you lots of good energy as you navigate your health issues as well. That stuff is rough and shitty, and I hope you find clarity and a path to healing soon.
(TW: unsolicited advice; Ignore if unhelpful! Two immediate fam members have MS but I got a "clean" MRI a couple months ago after similar issues. Just know that you are the world's greatest expert on your body and your experience. Document everything, log your symptoms if you can, and trust that you're not making it up. And I hope you crowdfund for an MRI if you're open to it. You'd either have the confirmation you need to start some extremely helpful meds OR you'll have a Big Thing ruled out and can pivot accordingly.)
That is so funny about Pelagia! Yeah idk I get the instinct to ignore it very much
"Stop defending the system. The system doesn’t fucking work." 💯